Friday, March 30

28 Weeks Later

I get scared at pretty much any movie that doesn't have singing, fancy ladies in carriages, or some kind of marijuna-related hijinks, so I was pretty surprised with myself when I discovered how much I liked 28 Days Later. Cillian Murphy MAY have had something to do with that. Anyway, hopefully the sequel, 28 Weeks Later, will be as good. Even if there are no hot guys.

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Is Joel Stein hot?


good things in the world of talk shows, musicals, death and divorce

Wednesday, March 28

Friday Quiz - 30 March

Pass it along to your work buddies. Don't double-check guesses online. Find the answers in the comments.

1. Which TV show was not originally based on a British series: Three's Company, Sanford and Son, or Charlie's Angels?
2. Name one of the original five MTV VJs.
3. Finish the lyric: "They were four men living all together..."
4. David Brent was the boss at Wernham-Hogg. Who's in charge at Dunder-Mifflin?
5. What is the first name of Mr. Nahasapeemapetilon?
6. Who is the lead singer of The Cure?
7. Who is Robert Cummings better known as?
8. Who was the lead singer of Boomtown Rats?
9. Robert Moog is best known as the inventor of what kind of musical instrument?
10. Kevin Spacey played which '50s teen idol in Beyond the Sea?
11. The character Indiana Jones was originally meant to be played by which actor?
12. Keanu Reeves: Ted "Theodore" Logan or Bill S. Preson, Esq.?
13. Which film has Flea not appeared in: The Big Lebowski, Benny and Joon, or Back to the Future II?
14. The 1977 film Star Wars was later given what subtitle?
15. Which original movie is not based on a play: Amadeus, Cabaret, or Hairspray?
16. What is the name of Ronald McDonald's giant purple friend?
17. Veterans Day was originally called what?
18. The tortoise and the hare, the wolf in sheep's clothing, and the ant and the grasshopper are all fables attributed to which ancient Greek?
19. What year saw the death of Queen Victoria and William McKinley: 1895, 1901, or 1905?
20. Which superhero is a Marvel character: Batman, Superman, or Spiderman?


Necktoos + Slutty Dolls + Movie = Transexual?

My most-hated (fashion-based) reality TV show (on Bravo) contestant ever, Jeffrey "Necktoo" Sebelia is splittin' up with his babymomma, as if I give a damn. The part of the article that interested me was this:

It's rumored that the designer will be working on the clothes for the upcoming "Bratz" movie.

A Bratz movie? As in based on the dolls that make young girls dream of becoming Amanda Lepore when they grow up? And I assume it would be live-action since there is a need for a clothing designer? Fantastic, Jeffrey. Way to make me hate you even more. Tim Gunn would not approve.

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In Other News...

Immigration: The Human Cost

The Onion News Network is up and running.


Did You Know...

...there are currently seven (7!) British television shows in development for the U.S. in the coming year or so? This here is one of the best-written articles about television I've ever encountered, and while I'm not familiar with "The IT Crowd" or "Viva Blackpool," I can indeed vouch for the validity of the rest of author's predictions. I doubt, however, any of them will work. And truly, until someone decides to put "The Jeremy Kyle Show" into syndication over here, I'm not going to hold my breath for a quality cross-Atlantic translation.

Just subscribe to BBC America. I mean, except for the "Benny Hill" and "Are You Being Served?" marathons, it's a pretty solid network. You'll recognize almost every one of the daytime shows, because TLC decided to take each premise and make it crappier.

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5000 White People + 1 Asian Guy =

Apparantly a documentary about air guitars. It looks OUTSTANDING. Did anyone see this at SXSW?

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Robbie Williams Breaks My Heart

I keep reading about Robbie Williams attempting to hook up with Lindsay Lohan, and it breaks my heart. I truly thought he was better than this sort of thing, but clearly that's not the case. I'm sure it's all for publicity, of course. No one here knows who he is, but everybody knows Lohan. That's it...yeah, he's just trying to get his name out there! Go Robbie Go!

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Monday, March 26


Is Gael Garcia Bernal hot?
My opinion is yes, without question...but I know some silly people disagree. Are you one of them? Am I not friends with you anymore? What about his face do you not like, the handsome?

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Friday, March 23

Being All Existential is Like, Hard

It's like poor Jason Schwartzman wants mommy Lily Tomlin and daddy David O. Russell to JUST STOP FIGHTING! There's all kinds of awesome swears, so this is NSFW, etc.

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Friday Quiz - 23 March

Hey kids! The quiz is the same as last week - don't check online and find the answers in the comments! Also, let me know if you find an error - I made one last week. Even the beautiful and brilliant are not perfect.

1. What color was Monica Lewinsky's semen-stained dress?
2. Name a television show produced by Sid and Marty Krofft.
3. All Quiet on the Western Front was about a solder of what nationality in WWI?
4. Who sang "I Think We're Alone Now" in 1987: Tiffany, Debbie Gibson, or Kylie Minogue?
5. Which designer is not English: Mary Quant, Vivienne Westwood, or Donna Karan?
6. "Tales From the Crypt" aired on what cable channel?
7. Limahl, singer of the theme song to The Neverending Story, was fired as lead vocalist from which '80s pop group?
8. Who recorded a duet of "Somethin' Stupid" with Robbie Williams in 2001?
9. What is the name of Calvin's pet tiger?
10. Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
11. What is the name of Colin Firth's character in Bridget Jones's Diary?
12. What is the name of Colin Firth's character in Pride & Prejudice?
13. What is the name of Michael Corleone's first wife in The Godfather?
14. Who is the singer/actress that played the female lead in Purple Rain?
15. Painter and activist Frida Kahlo was married to what other artist?
16. Who has not hosted "Family Feud": Richard Dawson, Richard Karn, or Richard Branson?
17. Kylie Minogue's first US hit was a cover of what song?
18. Who is not a Hanson brother: Taylor, Devon, or Zac?
19. Who has not been married to Lisa Marie Presley: Michael Jackson, Nicholas Cage, or Woody Harrelson?
20. How many gigawatts of electricity does it take to power the DeLorean in Back to the Future?


Wednesday, March 21

I Hope A Celebrity ODs


Nothing is Happening Today


Monday, March 19

Womyn's Herstory Munth!

So, March is Women's History Month, and one television channel I receive is awesomely showing a number of women-related films to brighten up my ovaries this month. The movies?

Elizabeth, Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood, Bridget Jones: Edge of Reason, and Girl, Interrupted.

So, we've got a movie about one of the world's most powerful monarchs, two about women equating mental illness with friendship, and another about a chick who's super old (33!) and fat and really really wants to get married.

Seriously, it's hilarous. Elizabeth would seem more out of place except for the fact she had serious Daddy issues, you know?

For Black History month, they played "Ray" over and over again. Every black man is a junkie musican. True story.

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Some Records

I love looking at lists - Greatest Fruit, Coolest People, Tastiest Cakes - they're all obviously clear subjects that have right and wrong answers (pomegranate, me, and yellow with chocolate frosting). The internet has made bitching and arguing and whining over arbitrary rankings great fun; my new favorite list, The Definitive 200 Albums Every Music Lover Should Own, is sure to cause all kinds of rumblings among these old tubes. Why? Well, partly because the selection was made by the National Association of Recording Merchandisers (who want you to BUY or RE-BUY these albums! From a retailer!) and partly because 95% of the albums on the list suck.

But you know what? It's easy to mock others. For once, let me mock myself. The following is a list of records I own/owned that are among the Definitive 200; please, take time to look over the albums and share your shame with me.


Okay, four out of the Top Ten. Very dull, relatively unimpeachable choices. Sgt. Pepper's is by no means my favorite Beatles album, but whatever.


I haven't listened to it since I was about 16, and I could probably only list off the singles.


Required (by law) to be on the Top Twenty of every list ever.


Okay, here we go. I don't remember why it was purchased, but it was getting mad play on my Walkman back in '96. This was a pretty big deal for me; you have remember this was still in the days when talking about giving blowjobs in theatres was considered risque lyrical content, and I was only 12 or so. Oh Alanis, you helped kick-start the angst of my teen years. Well done.


Okay, my favorite Beatles album is at number 42. Whatever. I ain't re-buying it. I've got most of it ripped to my iPod.


I actually saw Green Day a couple of years ago at Gaylord with a couple of girlfriends. The tickets were free, the show was pretty good, and we (ranging in age from early- to late-20s) were the oldest people there who didn't have any children. It was slightly bizarre.


Both good records. As good as #57, Get Rich or Die Tryin'? Obviously not.


I'm so boring. I used to really admire repetition, I guess.


It was called "junior high" and those were crazy times. Sometimes you wanted to push people around, and I don't actually remember any of the other songs...I always preferred Third Eye Blind, anyway.


I'm so boring. I used to really admire repetition, I guess.


It's no "Dookie," but what can you do?


I'm not as embarrassed on the whole as I thought I was going to be.


I loved this record. Beginning to end, I thought it was just about the best thing ever. I haven't listened to it in years, and now wonder if it would stand up over time. Of course, I sold it ages ago. I'm not buying it again.


The Smashing Pumpkins were my absolute favorite band when I was in high school. I can tell you the exact moment I heard this record: It was the summer of 1998 and I was on a class trip to Washington, DC, and the CDs were lent to me on the plane. I bought it as soon as I got back home, and had the band on repeat for like, 5 years. I think Siamese Dream is a better album overall, but I won't deny the role this record played in my whining teenage years.




I have no problems with either one of these.

Only 23 out of 200 - I think I got off pretty easily, all things considered. There were no Greatest Hits on there (so technically I could not admit to owning the Journey they listed), so that cut my list down a bit. There was also no Spice Girls or Hanson or N'Sync - Christina Aguilera was the only bubblegum listed, and she's all respectable and shit nowadays. No fun!

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I don't think it's any big secret the United States and Mexico kind of hate each other. And we hate Venezuela. And Cuba. And Canada. I'm willing to bet Brazil has major issues with Peru, and so on and so on. The Americas hate one another - so do the Europes. However, while we're busy digging canals, importing/exporting drugs, or doing whatever it is embargoes do, those crafty Europeans have been fighting out their differences in a different way - the Eurovision way.

If you're not familiar, the gist of it is every year, each European country selects a musical act to represent them in the Eurovision competition, and the program is broadcast throughout the continent and voted on over the phone by viewers at home: it's kind of like "American Idol," but infinitely more gay.

How gay, you ask? Here's the UK entry for 2007.

Anyway, one group/country is declared the winner and receives...I don't know, pride, I guess? I'm pretty sure there are no actual prizes or dignity available, but it's still a brilliant concept this hemisphere should steal; my bet is Canada would enter something Québécois.

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Friday, March 16

Hot New Feature!

Do you work? Do you work as little as possible on Fridays? If so, my brand new Friday Quiz is just for you! Every Friday, I hope to present 20 questions based on music, film, television, or "random" pop culture facts. Your job is to guess as many correct answers as possible WITHOUT using the internet for help; the whole point is to see just how much of your mind has been wasted on retaining pop culture knowledge rather than basic skills for functioning in reality.

The answers will be found in the "Comments" section.

1. What is the name of Gwen Stefani's debut album?
2. Who was the heiress kidnapped by the Symbionese Liberation Army in 1974?
3. Which actor has never been nominated for an Academy Award: John Turturro, Philip Seymour Hoffman, or Johnny Depp?
4. What does ELO stand for?
5. What was the name of the cult that committed mass suicide in 1997 when the Hale-Bopp comet passed Earth?
6. Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris, directors of music videos "Tonight, Tonight" by Smashing Pumpkins and "By the Way" by Red Hot Chili Peppers recently directed what Oscar-nominated film?
7. Which sports apparel company is not based out of Germany: Puma, Adidas, or Reebok?
8. Marcia Wallace, the actress who voices Mrs. Krabappel on "The Simpsons," played a receptionist in what popular 1970s sitcom?
9. Tonya Harding has participated in what sport since 2003?
10. Who invented the seed drill: Franz Ferdinand, Jethro Tull, or Arthur "Uncle" Tupelo?
11. Which Muppet does not appear on "The Muppet Show:" Scooter, Miss Piggy, or Grover?
12. Who was the first actress to play Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
13. The Raëlians claimed success in what long-fantasised scientific procedure in 2002?
14. Who has not hosted "Talk Soup:" Aisha Tyler, Hal Sparks, or Mo Rocca?
15. "Northern Exposure" is supposed to take place in which state?
16. Which "Saturday Night Live" character was never given their own movie: Pat, Stuart, or Mango?
17. The Tom Petty video "Don't Come Around Here No More" is based on which children's story?
18. The 1996 film Trainspotting is about a group of people addicted to what drug?
19. What was the best-known alias of rapper Dirt McGirt?
20. What nationality is actor Gael Garcia Bernal?


Wednesday, March 14

Since U Been Gone

I decided to give myself a little blogging hiatus to focus on sleep, school, and not going blind. I've barely kept up with any sort of Trash news, and it looks like I haven't missed much. I blame one person:

Anna Nicole Smith.

I didn't give a damn about her when she was alive, and I care even less about her now that she's dead. I don't care who the father of her sad little baby is, I don't care who gets her hard-earned gold digger cash, I don't care how gross her body was before it was buried, I don't care what kind of drugs she was using, and I don't care how many laws she was breaking in however many countries. I don't care about her mother, dead son, lawyer, ex-husband, dead husband, ex-boyfriend, former personal assistant, Bobby fucking Trendy, or the random Bahamian lady who is caring for current headline and future trainwreck Dannielynnenneen.

It's all there is to read about. It's all those who are being paid to blog blog about. CNN Headline News, Fox News, MSNBC, Court TV, Us Weekly, People, Star, and so on and so forth into infinity forever. I was, am, and will continue to be burned out on the topic.

It's weird enough more attention is being paid to dead Anna than still-living Britney (who also bores the hell out of me nowadays) or Kate or Lindsey or whatever. It's almost like I don't 'care' anymore.

And if all that's not enough: "American Idol" is boring this season. "Top Design" proved to be a bust. "Lost" is wavering between superb and terrible. Hence my hiatus. I needed a break from thinking about Anna Nicole taking over my precious Trash and my television abandoning me for solid mediocrity (except you, "House." Luv.) before I'm overwhelmed by the sheer inanity of it all and I start to care about, like, the environment or something.

So. I'm going to give it a go again. I'm going to attempt to write more and quip less, and hopefully comment on awesomeness from years gone by; years ago when Anna Nicole Smith was still Vicki Lynn Whoever.


Trashley Illustrates a Current Event!


Is Eddie Izzard hot?
I'm a fan of his comedy. I'm not quite sure how I should feel about his heteromasculine goatee.


Wednesday, March 7

Not Gone...

...On a brief hiatus.

It's my spring break, people. I've decided to spend this time going to various doctors and eating girl scout cookies. No offense.