Saturday, March 29

I Am Old Now

I don't know the answers to any of the following questions:

What are The Jonas Brothers? Do they date Miley Cyrus? Are they Nickelodeon or Disney? Are they actually brothers like Hanson, or are they fake brothers like the Doobies? Do they have anything to do with Hayden Panini-tiara? Were they real or invented? Which one is the cute one? Are any of them old enough to be cute? Is there a gay one? Are they popular for real?

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Blogger Elizabeth said...

i also was wondering who they are! but i never cared enough to google them.

4:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't consider it a sign of "getting old". Consider it a sign that you're starting not to care about stupid, meaningless, bullshit designed to divert attention away from things that actually matter and manipulate you into buying more useless crap.

It works for me.

For the record, I looked up the answers to your Jonas questions on "The Internets". Here's what I found out.

Apparently, the Jonas Brothers are like the Doobie Brothers. They're fake brothers who smoke a lot of weed and spontaneously burst into song like an episode of Cop Rock or Viva Laughlin. Believe me, I'd rather watch Viva Laughlin than listen to them sing.

As for Miley Cyrus, she did a scene with them in the Disney Climax production, Achy Breaky Butt3; a scene that culminated in a circle jerk in three part harmony over the aforementioned Cyrus; a scene that received two AVN nominations.

While they deny being gay, they met on-set during a Jet Set Men Studio's "Twink" film. So, I guess they're all "The Cute One".

And yes. They do celebrate Hayden Panini-tiara, which usually falls between Hanukkah and Kwanzaa.

12:39 PM  

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