Friendly Advice

Nail polish from the Gap is shit. Don't ever buy it. I take a deep red off of my hands this morning and my fucking nails are left stained like they've been sitting in bowls of cherry Kool-Aid. It's not coming off. My hands are ruined. I am going to have to wear fresh nail polish every day for at least 8 months while this shit grows out. I don't even really wear nail polish that often. My fingernails have just started to look kind of nice, and so I treat them with a little bit of sassy red, and look at what happens. This is fucking ridiculous. 

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Hey! I'm starting a new etiquette/advice blog, and it's kind of hard to post if I don't have any questions. Send your conundrums to ask@askmissseptember.com (or click on the 'Ask Miss September' link at the top of the website).

I can give super excellent and funny advice on dating, dining, how to nicely tell gramma to step off, and a myriad of other postmodern problems destroying young American lives. 

So Apt! So Apt!

Oh, how I wish I could take credit for this comparison, but I actually saw it first on Jezebel. Mostly I'm just glad I'm not the only person who watches "King of the Hill."